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Ebook Midsummer Night's Dream by William Shakespeare read! Book Title: Midsummer Night's Dream
Language: English
Format files: PDF
The size of the: 742 KB
v The author of the book: William Shakespeare
Edition: HarperCollins Publishers
Date of issue: September 1st 2011
ISBN: 0007902379
ISBN 13: 9780007902378
City - Country: No data

Read full description of the books Midsummer Night's Dream:

A Midsummer Night's Dream, abridged.

DEMETRIUS: I love Hermia!

LYSANDER: Shut up, I love her MORE. Anyway, you already hooked up with Helena.

DEMETRIUS: Who?

HERMIA: I want to marry Lysander but I'm already engaged to Demetrius and he won't leave me alone! Two hot boys are in love with me, WHY IS MY LIFE SO HARD?

HELENA: FUCK. YOU. ALL.

TITANIA: Hey Oberon, I got a new Indian baby from one of my dead servants.

OBERON: I want that kid - hand it over, or I'll punish you with bestiality.

PUCK: Holy shit, there's so much awkward in that sentence I don't even know where to start.

HELENA: I'm lost in the woods and for some reason Demetrius likes me now! WTF?

HERMIA: I'm lost in the woods and for some reason Lysander hates me! WTF?

DEMETRIUS AND LYSANDER: We're lost in the woods and WE LOVE HELENA OMG.

PETER QUINCE AND COMPANY: We're lower-class actors, and therefore hilarious.

BOTTOM: I got turned into a donkey. And just in case anyone's missed out on the subtle humor of my name, I'm going to be called an ass by just about everyone in this play.

EVERYONE: Hee hee! Butt jokes.

PUCK: Well, this is an epic clusterfuck. How are we supposed to get this all sorted out?

OBERON: Easy. Just use my patented Make Everything Better potion!

*POOF*

DEMTRIUS: I love Helena!

HELENA: I love Demetrius!

LYSANDER: I love Hermia!

HERMIA: I love Lysander!

TITANIA: I love Oberon!

OBERON: And we'll just keep your little fling with Donkey Man between me and the internet, okay?

TITANIA: My who with a what?

PETER QUINCE AND COMPANY: Hey, look! We're still hilarious!

THESEUS: Okay, everybody's married to everybody - time to fuck like bunnies!

EVERYONE: YAY!

THE END.


Midsummer Night's Dream read online



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Ebook Midsummer Night's Dream read Online! William Shakespeare (baptised 26 April 1564) was an English poet and playwright, widely regarded as the greatest writer in the English language and the world's pre-eminent dramatist. He is often called England's national poet and the "Bard of Avon" (or simply "The Bard"). His surviving works consist of 38 plays, 154 sonnets, two long narrative poems, and several other poems. His plays have been translated into every major living language, and are performed more often than those of any other playwright.

Shakespeare was born and raised in Stratford-upon-Avon. Scholars believe that he died on his fifty-second birthday, coinciding with St George’s Day.

At the age of 18 he married Anne Hathaway, who bore him three children: Susanna, and twins Hamnet and Judith. Between 1585 and 1592 he began a successful career in London as an actor, writer, and part owner of the playing company the Lord Chamberlain's Men, later known as the King's Men. He appears to have retired to Stratford around 1613, where he died three years later. Few records of Shakespeare's private life survive, and there has been considerable speculation about such matters as his sexuality, religious beliefs, and whether the works attributed to him were written by others.

Shakespeare produced most of his known work between 1590 and 1613. His early plays were mainly comedies and histories, genres he raised to the peak of sophistication and artistry by the end of the sixteenth century. Next he wrote mainly tragedies until about 1608, including Hamlet, King Lear, and Macbeth, considered some of the finest examples in the English language. In his last phase, he wrote tragicomedies, also known as romances, and collaborated with other playwrights. Many of his plays were published in editions of varying quality and accuracy during his lifetime, and in 1623, two of his former theatrical colleagues published the First Folio, a collected edition of his dramatic works that included all but two of the plays now recognised as Shakespeare's.

Shakespeare was a respected poet and playwright in his own day, but his reputation did not rise to its present heights until the nineteenth century. The Romantics, in particular, acclaimed Shakespeare's genius, and the Victorians hero-worshipped Shakespeare with a reverence that George Bernard Shaw called "bardolatry". In the twentieth century, his work was repeatedly adopted and rediscovered by new movements in scholarship and performance. His plays remain highly popular today and are consistently performed and reinterpreted in diverse cultural and political contexts throughout the world.

According to historians, Shakespeare wrote 37 plays and 154 sonnets throughout the span of his life. Shakespeare's writing average was 1.5 plays a year since he first started writing in 1589. There have been plays and sonnets attributed to Shakespeare that were not authentically written by the great master of language and literature.



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